Today I cooked a lot, which makes me feel a lot better than I did the last few days. I actually felt better the whole day, because I am doing everything with more attention and I am thinking less about what doesn’t go right and how I should follow rules about how to eat and how to act.

I also painted today, Irene asked me to design the cover of her CD. I listened to her mantra’s and I was painting a flower at some point without even thinking about it. I’m really enjoying this way of painting, because my thoughts are totally gone for a while (it feels like meditating).

When I wanted to take a shower, I saw a REALLY big spider just chilling there in the shower. I’m way more calm now after a few weeks of meditating and letting go of fears and stuff, also I really like animals and nature way more now. But this spider was really big and there was no man home to come and save me (my dad and little brother always like to pick up the spiders, walk with them until my sister, mom and I are almost screaming to get it out of the house, and then they walk outside or just throw the spider into the toilet…), so this time I had to save myself. I think I did a pretty good job just trying to drown it by pointing the shower at it, but it did take me at least 15 minutes, because it kept coming out of the drain.

3 things I’m grateful for today:

  • My mom, who keeps helping me with a LOT of things
  • That I learn a lot from mistakes and the days that I feel a little bad
  • That Irene let’s me design the cover of her CD


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