Last night I slept really deep, but I woke up two times because of the wind. The second time I woke up, I also heard a noise that sounded like a gunshot, so obviously I thought to myself; ‘okay this is it, a man will come in with a gun in a few minutes’, but I guess I just fell asleep while thinking that because I don’t remember laying awake or thinking about it more. Maybe I was just really tired haha.

So my head and body are getting more calm with every minute I’m here, and I start to feel really excited about the little things again (it was getting less at home, so now I feel really happy and relieved). Eventually I want to take certain stuff I can do on a day home with me, so I don’t lose the feeling, but I guess I will just notice those things after a while. Now I’m just really excited about how good my body feels and that I get a really good detox from the chemo and the tumor this way!


<Someone taking the cows out for a walk

After lunch I went to a lecture about the Ayurveda, because it’s always nice to see what I’m exactly doing here and, most importantly, why I’m doing what I’m doing (I mostly followed my gut feeling when I decided to come here haha). Turns out, the Ayurveda has a LOT of rules about how to eat, sleep and even have sex. I feel like I can learn a lot of interesting things and the atmosphere is definitely something I’d like to take with me in a jar or something, but at this moment I feel like leaving the strict rules here and just go with the flow when I get home. So for now, a year feels a little long so I guess a month is enough 😉 (also it’s raining a lot and in the Netherlands the sun is shining right now).

Also I read a lot today in Be Happier Than The Dalai Lama and a book my mom put on the e-reader (thanks mom 😉 ) about the Ayurveda. A lot of things I do in here now make more sense and I asked my doctor about a few things when he came by;

  • So I knew about the three doshas (the different types of energy, they are found inside your body in the organ systems, but in this situation they can represent three different types of humans. They say TYPES of humans, because every human is different because of the atmosphere they are put into), vata (energy and air – stands for movement and communication), pitta (fire and water – stands for metabolism and transformation) and kapha (earth and water – stands for growth and stability). But I read more about them in the book and noticed that I saw that I had a lot of the pitta type in my way of behaving and some physical aspects. I asked my doctor about that and he told me that I’m a kapha-pitta type, but that the kapha is just more out there.
  • The doctor told me before that too much of kapha in my system was the cause of the cancer. I read about how too much of the water element by a kapha person can cause disease (of course, too much of any element causes disease). Every one knows that when water can’t move, that it is going to kind of rot. When a kapha doesn’t keep the water ‘fresh’ by certain foods, thoughts or a certain lifestyle, the water can’t flow through them very well and a disbalance in the growth of the cells and tissue(s) takes place. The water, which is so important by a kapha type, starts to rot. I asked him if they saw it like this and he told me that any kind of disbalance causes disease, but that the way the disease behaves, is different for any type of dosha. So it doesn’t bring me any further, but I guess I’ll get it all a little more over time.

I also read that the lymph system represents the joy of life/essence/emotions/melody and that when there goes something wrong at those aspects, a disbalance takes place and that someone will get sick. I feel like it’s really important to know when you get cancer, what the organ(s) it is found in, represent(s). I heard before from Henk Fransen (a Dutch doctor who told me about this centre. He is setting up a hospital in the Netherlands for people with cancer to treat them with alternative therapies, so he is also going to this centre with them) that they look at cancer this way too, but I forgot to ask the doctors how they exactly look at it and how it works when it spreads to other organs or when it grows into some organ… I will ask them when I see them tomorrow.

I think I never felt a jetlag before, but I guess that when you suddenly get tired or hungry at some point of the day, it is called a jetlag. Tomorrow my very special diet will start, so I’m really going to enjoy the salt in the food when I go to dinner in a few minutes!!!

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